ERRORS OF THE PAST

There comes a time
when you must heed a certain call,
and rush to the bathroom
and get some shit done.
After that
it’s time to rock the resolutions.

I shall wash my sins away
cleansing myself of yesterday
starving myself of the bad
and stuffing myself
with what is to come.

I shall take up dancing.
I’ll find a job.
I will cease all smoking
of the legal variety.

I will become a better man
or, at least, a bigger one,
able to forgive my enemies with a single sound
and not only after their assassination.

Finally, I will drop some weight
– which is where you come in.
As I clean up the errors of the past,
I realize it’s half past time for us to part.
I’ve learned my lesson.
No longer will I worship at the altar of your ignorance.
I am done putting your vagina on a pedestal
– though you can do with it
what you want.
It makes no sense to me,
but then,
it’s not my concern
on this happy happy new year.