Are you ready for this?
I can’t hear you:
are you ready for this?
I don’t think you are.
I don’t think you could possible be prepared for the preeminent panther attack that is about to…
pounce?
Yeah: Pounce!

What you are about to witness
is the sound of street knowledge
and boulevard knowledge
and sidewalk knowledge.
You’re gonna hear something
and feel something
and learn something.

I am a small bitter man
made even smaller when faced with the kind of colossal talent that is Jonathan Whistle McFinnerty Berger.
My penis is small
and I express that little secret by failing to give talents as great as this next act
their due.
I am sorry my introduction was not up to the challenge.
Luckily, this next performer is.
Please welcome:
Him.