Look, I’m no hero
(even if I seem to be one)
but I can tell what side
my bread is buttered on.
The other day
I was walking downtown
and I saw a burning building
and I did what any self-respecting
normal guy would do:
triple somersaulted onto the fourth floor
looked for burning infants,
tossed them out the window,
then climbed on the outside of the building to the roof
to see if anyone had left their pets behind.

It only takes so little
to be better than everyone else
and if you try,
maybe
– just maybe –
you can be superior
like me.