Monthly Archives: April 2016

So the experiment didn’t work? Yeh, I thought that might happen. What were the odds of sewer crocs coming up to your hallway to eat all your spoiled meat? Now it’s even more spoilt. Who’s gonna clean up that mess? … Continue reading →

Look at this guy this sweaty pathetic boy. What harm can it do? Why not help a brother out? Give the guy a gig. He probably has some friends who might come out to see him if he asks really … Continue reading →

There’s a secret cheat code to the universe or, at least, America. I know there is. I see evidence everywhere. Others are so effortless in their success. Others know how to make money how to make love how to make … Continue reading →

I’m sorry but it’s not going to happen today. Try as you might anticipate and plan you’re still not dying of anything. Not in the short term at least. I have no doubt in another hundred years you’ll be buried … Continue reading →

It is hot. I am itchy. I am alone in this pit I call home wondering how I’ll get through this night. I have somewhere to go tomorrow and there is no sleep to be had in this bed. Please … Continue reading →

Abort. Abort! The center can’t hold. The plan is collapsing. We’re gonna blow any minute. It’s over, Johnny; we gotta go! The Big Score’ll have to wait until another day if we can make it out of this one. We … Continue reading →

Every dollar gone. Every bit of sense expended. Every buck wildly misplaced from my billfold. Everything is lost. I am exhausted. I am beaten. I am spent. It wasn’t so long ago that I was flush with excitement. Opportunity abounded … Continue reading →

We talk about a lot of things except the things that are important to you but I cannot bear to mention. You want explanations and resolutions and I just want to get through another day without incident or any discussion … Continue reading →

She asked me what I wanted. "What you really want," she said, "if you’re being honest." So I thought and I pondered and I wondered if I’d ever been honest with this girl or any girl or anybody ever in … Continue reading →

While Peter had his stroke I was eating cheese puffs getting blown by some overaged professional thinking “it doesn’t get much better than this.” As Peter raced to the hospital I was ordering another pair of pies from another international … Continue reading →