After all this time
and it’s ensuing silence
I feel that our every anniversary
is a test of my resolve
a chance for me to see for myself
if I still care,
or really, how much.

Each year
on this day that we first came together
I think about you
and I think about reaching out
and I think about the likelihood
of you taking my call
or responding to my letter
or answering the bell
(assuming you still live
where you once did).
Each year
I think about you
and if I’m weak
I try to get in touch.

You never respond.
Maybe you can’t.
Maybe you’re gone.
Maybe you don’t even recall our dates
and our history
and this anniversary is mine alone to bear.
Maybe you have better things
to think about.
I wish I knew
what you think about me.

Every anniversary is a test for me
and every anniversary
you win me over again.