I could have done more.
If I’d just…
I don’t know.
I could have done more.

If I’d made more money…
I threw away so much money
on Cheetos and porn
you have no idea.
If I’d just…
I didn’t do enough.

One more email.
One more post.
I could have reached out to relatives
in the mid-west.
I could have pretended to be someone’s relative
in the mid-west,
some old doddering conservative
hearing from grand-nephew Jimmy
for the first time in years.
I could have convinced fake Great Aunt Fanny
or someone like her
to take another path.

This car.
I could have sold this car.
Why did I keep the car?
Ten sponsored posts right there.
Ten posts
to a community of my choice.
Ten more people turned.
Ten more votes.

This pinned message
at the top of my feed.
I could have made more.
I could have shared more posts
or phone banked
or gone door to door.

There is so much I could have done
so much that could have helped
so many groups to donate to.
I could have gotten more word out
and I didn’t.
I didn’t
and now
a chill goes through me.