If you were responsible
if you worked on a regular schedule
if you got up at the right time
took the right vitamins
got the right sort of exercise
you wouldn’t get into this sort of trouble now,
would you?

Would you?

I’d help you,
really I would,
if I didn’t think
that it would more likely
hinder your development
than give you a hand.

I swear
I don’t believe it would do you
a dash of good
to provide you
an ounce of support right about now.

What you need
is a little of the tough love
and, of course,
some heartfelt advice
so you know what to do
next time.

So where was I?
Oh yes:
If I was you…