Cow milk’s not good for me. I can take it
but I prefer not to
so I go for almond milk.

I haven’t looked at the carbon footprint too carefully
but if I did,
I’d probably be better with cow’s milk
considering all the gas I produce with it.

I love ice cream.
I love it explosively.
I try to avoid it.
I’m not great at avoiding things I love.

My best form of self-control
is never starting.
So why did I bring this up?
Now I need a pint of some peanut butter cup
and by pint I mean quart.
And by quart I mean
I gotta go.