A Wealth of Concerns
I’ve got an abundance of excuses as to why
I’m not qualified for the position
you’re trying to fill.

I haven’t worked in your office before.
You have no idea how I’m going to fit in
with the other employees.

It’s been at least a week since I’ve worked in any office.
Who knows how I’ll behave around civilized people?

I’ve been know to get a little focused on the work
at the expense of proper socialization
in professional settings.
I wouldn’t want that to happen with you guys.

Lastly, I’ve killed at least eight of my former colleagues
at my last job.
Frankly, I’m surprised I was able to get a reference from that company at all.

You didn’t check with them?
Oh. That’s disappointing.

Well, now that I’ve shared my reservations,
let me tell you why I think I’d be a good fit
for the position…