Pardon me, but you look like a stupider Frank Sinatra,
or a healthier Cheetos puff
or a wider Frenchie Legume
or a shakier uncurable god
or a left-leaning Spanakopita Pete.

Maybe you’re a less German Donald Drumph
or a more institutionalized Alfred Fantabulous
or a weirder Plain Jane
or a whiter Procul Harum.

Perhaps you’re a yes man to Rob Ryan…
You are?
Well, nice to meet you!