I don’t think I approve of my roommate having sex
when I’m not.
I feel like there should be a compact.
A sexless house when one of us is dry
and I’ve been dry since Carter.

This isn’t something we’ve discussed
but I feel it should be implied
and I’ve just implicated him in this plan,
so let us all assume it is so
whether he’s heard about it yet or no
until any further associations
have been otherwise made, shall we?
Thanks ever so.

Wait, does this mean our agreement
would have to be reciprocal?
Let’s hold off for a minute
and put on our thinking caps, then…