Author Archives: Jonathan Berger

I waited for weeks for my credit card to arrive only to discover that my upstairs neighbors had simply not given it to me. I do not use credit cards often, else it would have been a bigger deal. Luckily, … Continue reading →

What’s weird about Imperium City is that it’s a stochocracy: rule by lottery. The leader’s are picked by chance, so there’s no imperial rule in Imperium City, like if Kansas City were in Missouri. All right, bad example. Like if … Continue reading →

The waterbug didn’t need to die, but she asked and I didn’t want her anxious and it seemed the most expedient way. I stepped on it (them? I’m not sure if the dead or those of insect sort care about … Continue reading →

I fell for her like a broken elevator. I broke for her like a fallen elevator, too. I don’t think that I’ll allow myself to break that way again, I’m telling you. But I’m lying to myself, like I always … Continue reading →

The ads tell me what to think until I swallow that first drink and then I realize what to know until the eighth drink makes me throw them all up onto passing cars once I get thrown from favorite bars … Continue reading →

It’s the final countdown. There’s no more to do. We’re reaching the end; we’re just about through. There ain’t more to do. No-way, no-how. We’re just about done. It’s the final countdown! One, two, three, four… Nothing to countdown anymore. … Continue reading →

There were days when there was nothing going on. Just empty days, empty of ideas, absent of real thought. I’m lucky I’m past them now, and things are firing again. There is thought come back to the days and spirit … Continue reading →

Well, she was about ninety seven and her name was something Irish like Devon, when I saw her while trying not to be sedentary. To think I could have gone right on past her, when I checked her out at … Continue reading →

The bowl is receiving liquids from so many separate sources today. The rain, the dog and the pitcher all entering the bowl at different times. Today, I am that bowl.

We are getting soggy. You won’t like us when we’re soggy. You pour us when we’re dry, you add a little milk, so you don’t have us at our absolute driest, but you don’t want us completely drenched, trust me. … Continue reading →