The problems in the world grow greater every year.
The times, they are a’changin’, I can state with all due fear.
An idiot wind’s blowing in to the town today
and I sometimes need to ask myself if there is any way
to get through all the hurricanes and hard rains through the Fall
to arrive at Summer days and answer proudly nature’s call
to become the best that I could be; to mine own self be true.
And so I ask myself: what is it Dylan would do?

If Dylan were here he would crash and burn.
He would seek out his mentor for lessons to learn.
An asshole in his interviews, he’d tape on video
then release them to the world so his persona we would know.
He’d rarely be the same man twice, a cypher to his fans,
Dylan would deceive us, telling lies as part of plans
to always leave us guessing. Constantly we misconstrue
the way to reply to the question "What would Dylan do?"

Since Bob Dylan was discovered at the birth of the decade
that redefined our culture, countering the ways we made
our musicians into idols, our songwriters into stars,
he’s been so many people, though composed just one memoirs.
In any case, when you wonder how he’d handle it
– no matter what the "it" may be – it matters not a whit.
In film, he’s been portrayed as six, not merely one or two.
See he’d contain multitudes, is what Dylan would do.

Of the premier songsters, as the king Bob has been crowned
and his flexibility in telling stories is renowned.
His tales include his autobiography, it seems
for each story he stitches, seems to split some at the seams.
His life is inconsistent, when he tells it, week to weeks.
You can hear when Bobby’s lying; it’s whenever the guy speaks!
For a time, Robert Zimmerman denied being Jew
so it seems it really varies as to what would Dylan do.

If Dylan were around, he’d deny the things I’ve said.
He’d point to friends to verify his stories; they’d be dead.
He’d sing such social commentary, and bleat the best of songs
all of which get better when the covers come along.
He’s best being interpreted, that’s Dylan to a T.
And if you don’t like my critique, then don’t listen to me
for when asking what would Dylan do, the first on any list
is ignoring others’ comments. That’s what Dylan does the best.

About Jonathan Berger

I used to write quite a bit more.
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