I should probably just admit it:
I’ve been having this whole secret relationship
without you ever knowing.
Yeah, it’s time
to come clean.
I’ve been pretty heavily involved
with you
without your permission.

When we’ve been out late
talking, drinking,
arguing about pacifism versus knives
I’ve even thinking of you
lovingly, imagining
when we’ll finally argue
about real issues,
like how many kids to have
and whose parents should pay for the wedding
(Hint: in my imagination,
yours usually wins
or loses,
depending on the POV).

When you walk away,
I am watching.
When you tell me stories,
I am taking notes.
I am paying attention to your opinions
far more seriously than you might think,
considering the focus
you throw my way.

And maybe that’s the thing.
The core of my admission
I think
is that our relationship
is far from reciprocal.
While you have been chatting with me
getting the drinks,
I have secretly been loving you.

I just thought you should know
about the relationship
you have been wholly unaware of
and to ask
that if maybe
you could tell our girlfriends,
that would be really great.

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