Adam and Steve just hanging around that garden
fucking like nobody’s business
because it’s not
and really there’s nobody around to judge
except some smaller critters
and they only talk occasionally
after nibbling on some specific restricted fruits.
Stephen and Adam just while away their countless hours
lolling around the compound
inventing new sexual acts
defining deviance every dawning day
It’s an exciting adventure every gay time.
One of those afternoons
a giant caterpillar
after digging into the fruit
of the tree of knowledge,
thus gaining human speech,
spills the beans on the tree’s undisclosed location
so the private couple
(affectionately known in the trades as “Stam”)
head off and chomp on what looks suspiciously like an apple, but whatever.
they ask for a meet & greet
with the big boss.
God comes down to chat,
and full of fruit and fire,
Steve says, “How come we’re not in your image?”
God shrugs, thinking the humans would have preferred immortality to procreativity
but she’s nothing if not flexible.
She pivots on the fly,
switches Steve all up into a woman
(with a concomitant name change),
and gives them both the ability to make life and death,
‘Course, they messed with the order of things,
so they gotta get the fuck out of Dodge,
which is the garden,
which was home,
so they keep on trucking
and they keep on fucking
for a long while after
until they get pregnant
at which point
they don’t know what the fuck hit ’em.