Hey! I like how judgmental you are.
It really makes you likable
and I think it increases your ability
to appreciate situations
and people
and even the aesthetics of the universe
you inhabit.
No doubt:
your judgmental behavior
is one of your better characteristics
and has served you ever so well
all these years.
Keep up the good work!

Your pessimism, too,
is top notch.
It leaves you wary and suspicious,
sometimes, sure,
but that just means
you’re prepared for what life has to offer
and probably
if anything ever gets past
your net of critical hazardous assessment
you’ll be so joyous as to be positively euphoric.
I swear: I look forward to that day.

Your frown displays
a proud sense of purpose on your face
a direction and focus
that proves you know who you are
like few others.
You are brave and forthright
and your face projects that perfectly
all the time.
Good for you
and good for your sour, bitter face.
May it remain judgmental and negative
as long as it serves you
as well as it has.