Everything I say is impertinent.
How dare I?
What right do I have
to your time
or attention?
Who am I
to impose so self-righteously
with such impetuous ego?
The balls on me!
The temerity.

I don’t deserve what I ask,
I know that.
I never have.
I’m not worthy of your mention
or anything more
that’s been clear
well before the start
and I’m glad of every instant
that you ignore that fact
so thank you for this opportunity
here with you
today
and every day like it
and, while I have your ear here,
if your stiletto could perhaps be moved
from the bridge of my foot just a smidge,
that would be –
No?

All right then.