jonberger

I appreciate everything you’ve done:
all the smiles
and promises of affection
and even the package delivery
but there seems to be an issue.
These fruits you’ve provided
are not what you had offered.

It may seem small
but honesty is appreciated
in this household
and what you promised
I have not received.
You’d told me
there would be peaches aplenty
and I get that these
are in the same family
but a nectarine will not do.

I’m sorry.
I can’t accept these as gifts.
They are not satisfactory
even if their color is pleasing.
No one lives
in an orange nectarine
and you must get me what I want
or else I may look upon you
afterwards
with disfavor.

This is ridiculous.
You’re not gonna do it.
You won’t succeed,
I can assure you,
no matter how much
you may hope.
You’re not gonna get me
to believe in myself
however hard you try.

I am what I am
which I know all too well
and it will not change.
I will not let it.
My personality is too distinct,
my will is too strong.

I am too invested
in the me that I am,
the me you know.
No deviation
will be afforded
and no incentive will be enough
for this to change.

If I believe in myself
how will I go about my days?
What accomplishment
will be required of me
on a daily basis?
How much must I earn
if my excuses are torn away?

No!
It won’t do.
Confidence is not an upgrade
I can allow.
Whatever else you may want from me,
this will simply not happen.

There’s a lovely little bridge
I’ve been sitting under
yelling at anybody
who passes by.
It’s got the perfect cover
with shade and air
and nobody nearby even suspects
when I’m ready to snipe.

I like it.
I like what I’ve done with the place.
I like the comfort I have
to be cruel
to so many others
in this particular position of power.

I fear sometimes
this bridge spot
is going to be taken
and relocation from this domain
is imminent.
I hope it’s not so
or not too soon
for I am very afraid of change
and worry greatly
about what might happen
if I would have to perform
my acts of viciousness
from another location.

Is that how they ask guys out
where you come from?
Is this the way you treat boys
and try to win their favor?

I’m not complaining.
I just don’t understand you
– never really have –
and I don’t get your behavior
in most circumstances
so now
I’m unclear
if this bit of nonsense
we’re going through
is part of a pickup
or something else again.

Any answer’s all right with me.
I’m just trying to get a handle
on your head.
You can talk to me.
I may even understand.

If you’re not hitting to the bleachers and not aiming for the gold
if you aren’t seeking out outrageous fortunes yet untold
If you’re not working at all times to be better than the best
then by day’s end you will be, my friend, just a loser at his rest.

You should always be out hunting for new ways you can improve;
reach the apex of your area of expertise, just move
into places that through which you can grow closer to a goal
and soon you’ll be a stallion which had once been but a foal.

With the practice of ten thousand hours, you’ll blow up every joint
If you haven’t reached that level of achievement, what’s the point?
Anything less would be loserly and barely worth your time
– practically as hard as finding ways to end this bit rhyme.

You were the sweet young thing
far too hot to talk to
in ripped denim
and careless innocence.
I was the boy you’ve never seen
sticking to shadows
to better maintain my excellent view.

You seemed lonely
or alone, which,
from my position,
didn’t seem much different.
You seemed like you could use
some company.

I was too shy then,
but now,
am willing to provide that company
at any point
or any place.
Whether your home
your office of school,
I can meet you.
Just say the word
and the time
and what underwear you’ll be wearing.

I feel something growing between us
other than a restraining order.
Hit me up.

Where’s your boyfriend?
Where’s that guy
that’s been occupying your time?
Where’s the fellow
that’s been keeping you mellow?
Why are you here alone?

Is everything all right?
Where’s that kid?
You keeping him hid?
How goes it
with you and him?
You guys still happy?

I don’t care,
of course.
I’m not motivated in seeking the A to my Q,
not listening with biased ears
seeking a particular response.
I’m just curious.
I simply care about you
a lot
and want to know
why’s going on with you.

Where’s your boyfriend?
What’s up with that?

Cheating is under-rated.
If no one gets hurt
why not bend the rules
or break them
or even chew the little pieces
into a thick paste?

Why not walk on the wild side?
Hell,
why not jaywalk all over the wild side?
Who doesn’t jaywalk,
given an eighth of a chance?

Go.
Visit the wild side,
look around
take a weekend vacation there,
get a biscotti.
Don’t pay for it, though.
Why not?
Who should stop you?

Rules are made to be avoided.
It’s the American Way
which is the global way now
since everybody stole it.
Cheat.

I always win at solitaire.

When the Wave comes
you’re in for a world of it.
When the Wave comes
we’re all gonna go.

The Wave is heading here
maybe not today
maybe not tomorrow
but someday soon
and for the rest our lives.
Like lightning
it will come
and like nature
it will destroy.

The Wave may prove to be like
a brush fire
but in reverse
in that it will kill all
around it
– but not in no hot way.
The fire next time
will be water.

Look for it.
Ask for it by name.
It’s heading our way
eventually.
I can still hear them saying
you can never break the Wave.

You have to give me a break
give me a minute to explain
give me
your forgiveness.
I’m not that man anymore.
I no longer eat children
or rape fossils
or beat off on old Russian graves.

I have had epiphanies.
I am kinder, gentler now.
I am someone different
and do not do the things
that made you hate me.

I am better.
I am forgiveable.
If I am different in no other way
– and I am –
I am now one worthy
of you letting this old shit go
and then you lending me your car
indefinitely.

I deserve it.
I will not rape any fossils in it,
I promise.
Give it to me