Good Buy

I can tell by your look
what you want to say.
But before you say it
take a closer look.
Look deep.
Just take in
what you see before you.
This is maybe
the most expensive cybernetic shark-slash-sewing machine on the market
– and I got it for a great price.

I know you think we can’t afford it
but honey
you’re gonna have to trust me:
this will change our lives.
We’ve never really had the chance
to sew with sharks before
– you know you want to –
and this is the just best opportunity.
Believe me: it was a really good buy.
So good
I couldn’t turn it down.
If you ever see an opportunity like this
you just have to take it.
Well, I did.
It was almost a biological requirement.

And don’t worry.
With resale,
we’ll get most of the kids’ college fund back.
That is
if we ever give up this astounding addition
to our household.

I get it.
You’re on the fence.
Take some time.
Think if over.
Consider the options
and I’m sure you’ll see
how this will change you and me
forever.

What? Oh.

Goodbye.

About Jonathan Berger

I used to write quite a bit more.
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