Consider the Dolphin

John S. Hall, whom I do not stalk
(no matter what his staff may say)
just published a piece
wherein he mentions
a Dolphins Rape People bumper sticker
which seems a little mean-spirited.

How would dolphins seek acquiescence?
They don’t know our culture,
our laws
or even which country’s borders they swim about
(Dolphins certainly knows nothing
about ending sentences
in prepositions
unfluent as they are
in proper English
anyhow).

Also
dolphin culture is probably
still blissfully unaware
of American literary great
and generally tall guy David Foster Wallace
who published a collection of essays
called Consider the Lobster.
And no dolphin
I am sure
could suspect that a former girlfriend of John S. Hall,
Casey Scott,
once kept correspondence with
David Foster Wallace, pre-suicide
– for, intelligent and civilized
as dolphins may be,
how could they imagine the tangential
coincidental relations that we humans occasionally conceive?
It is the value of human ingenuity itself
that allows me to imagine
these curious connections.

I did not know about Casey knowing Wallace,
by the way,
because I’m stalking John S. Hall.
That’s just what the dolphins
want you to think.

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