If I were to meet any of Batman’s rogue’s gallery,
I think I’d like it to be the Mad Hatter.
He can tell people what to do,
hypnotically,
but he’s crazy,
so I get the sense
I could convince him
to use his powers for good,
by which I mean
helping me out.

If I were to meet any of Superman’s opponents,
I would like it to be Bizarro.
He’s so powerful
but pretty good-hearted
and maybe he’d take me for a flight somewhere
before accidentally squeezing me too hard
and making me into a diamond.

If I were to meet any of Wonder Woman’s enemies,
I think it should be the Cheetah
because she’s a giant sexy cat
who’d scratch my back
and also
she might be able to introduce me to Wonder Woman.