I stayed in shadows
not because I didn’t want to be seen
but because I was afraid.
If I was seen
would I be recognized?
If I was recognized
would anyone remember my name?
What identity would be recalled?
Which ridiculous version of myself
would be pulled out of their memories
and would it be someone they wanted to see?
Would it be someone they liked?

It was better to remain hidden.

So I kept to the back.
I remained aloof
separate.
I maintained a separate peace.
It was easier.
It seemed elegant.
I felt safer
clinging to the darkness
where no one needed to see me
one way or another

until the lights came on
and my cousins called me a vampire
for the rest of the party.