That story you told
about your horrible experience
being beaten up
by Albert Schweitzer
and his psychopathic dog soldiers
back in the eighties
and how it changed your life
teaching you the value of serenity
and learning to love oneself
and not to place faith in idols
because they may prove false
while your own soul will always be true?
Riveting.

I did some research, though
and I’ve got some good news.
Schweitzer died in sixty five
so it couldn’t have been him
that beat you so traumatically
in your formative years
back in the eighties.
Maybe it was a Schweitzer lookalike or somesuch
but it wasn’t your hero
so it’s all right to put your faith in idols.

Your life lesson no longer applies.
Happy birthday!

Don’t look so down.
I’m sure there are other lessons
still to be learned from that brutality
like
don’t get beat up by dog soldiers
or anyone else, maybe?