Dear K,

In the recent poem I have yet to write,the Kirsten repeatedly referred to
in terms that could be considered
at best, unflattering
and at worst, illegal

shares certain characteristics with you.

She has your name.
She is a woman.

That is it.

I wanted to make this point quite clear
in advance
so that
when we get into our latest imbroglio
we will at least know
up front
the terms:
you mistook yourself
in the poem I wrote about another Kirsten
and got all hypersensitive
because that’s what you’re like, Kirsten.
Hypersensitive
and judgemental
and really mean.

In any case
I hope this finds you well
and that we can avoid any unpleasantness
regarding the poem
I have yet to write
regarding the coincidental individual
who has your name
and no other characteristics
in common with you
at all.

Sincerely,
Anon.