Category Archives: Uncategorized

Bruce Springsteen chortles. Joseph Heller sounded like some borscht belt immigrant. Truman Capote spoke in that faggy dog-pitched voice. Heroes don’t always sound the way you want. You won’t always sound the way you want or act the way you … Continue reading →

Let’s see if it makes sense this way: This is a lemon. There is no more pulp to squeeze. There is no juice left at all. We have gotten all we can in terms of liquid from this lemon. There … Continue reading →

So I’m surprised this hasn’t come up before but it’s going to be a lot harder for you to ever fall in love with me if you never return my calls. But maybe you have a different plan. Maybe you … Continue reading →

I can’t believe you, that you would reject me in this most heinous way. I offered to buy you a sandwich of the finest meats and bread and you reply with a disinterested “I’ll think about it”? “I’ll think about … Continue reading →

That’s it! I’m through. No longer will I just allow these snide and sarcastic comments to escape my lips. I am sick to death of the bastard in my body constantly needling, getting under everybody’s skin and leaving me hated … Continue reading →

I’m sorry that I stare so obviously, so frequently, but I’ve been trying to understand exactly what you are and I think you’ve caught me in a eureka moment. I know you now. You’re Weird Girl. You like the creepy … Continue reading →

Well, I think I got it. I understand what you’ve been meaning to say. You don’t want me. I’m pretty clear on that now but no matter what you say, suggest or subtly insinuate, I firmly believe it wasn’t always … Continue reading →

Watching his pain that impotent frustration as he cries in the corner for no reason I can see is nagging, it’s a niggling feeling. There is something I can do for him I’m sure but I don’t know what. I … Continue reading →

I should probably just admit it: I’ve been having this whole secret relationship without you ever knowing. Yeah, it’s time to come clean. I’ve been pretty heavily involved with you without your permission. When we’ve been out late talking, drinking, … Continue reading →

A word of advice, padwan. The more you write anthems to your incompetence, the more evidence you provide to the world of your exact insufficiencies. You provide the haters clues, your enemies a code sheet, you offer all those who … Continue reading →