I know you’re quoting me.
I can tell
that you’re listening to what I say
and appropriating the parts that you like.
You’re sampling me.
You’re collecting my ideas
and you’re using them
for your own suspicious purposes.

I get it.
Even I, occasionally,
will take the words
of those around me
and use them as my own.
The appeal to take
what is not yours
is very strong.
I understand.
I empathize.

But they’re mine,
my words,
and you’re mining them.
Mine!
I appreciate the honor
you bestow upon me
and respect your sources immensely
(obviously),
but would appreciate it
if all future conversations you are involved in
begin with the words
“This has been brought to you
thanks to the brilliance
of Jonathan Berger
without whom none of this would be possible.”

You could deviate
from the script I provide,
I suppose, but
why start now?