Sorry. I can’t go for that.
I don’t fault you for your choices
but all of that kind of shit
is behind me now.
You spend your weekends and nights
however you choose
but my stalking days are over.

I’m gonna give your plans a skip,
thank you very much.
I’ve gone on to healthier pursuits,
finding more natural ways to behave
with a better quality of people.
No longer do I don the trench coat,
fedora and Groucho glasses
to follow the streets she might walk.
That’s past tense me,
and not at all what I’m up to today.

You should take my advice
and drop that sort
of unsavory behavior.
Turn over a new leaf
and not turn to old tricks.
Better that you follow my example
than follow any other people.
Be like me
and stop stalking sooner
rather than later.

No, I’m not mandating this.
I’m not your judge nor jury
and you needn’t execute any of my suggestions
but before any of those august parties get involved
you’d do well and turn a corner
– just not the one she so recently took.