jonberger

She would tend plants
in the community space,
pulling up weeds,
that sort of thing.
She wore long flowing outfits
worried not at all
at how the dirt would treat her clothes.
Covered in mud
she was still the most beautiful flower
in attendance
and I immediately wanted to pluck her.

I had a black thumb
so there was no common ground
in which our love could grow
but still I circled Carole’s garden
if only to watch her
one of many admirers
part of her own personal corolla.

I still wonder
if there was some was some seed
I could have planted within her
so that she and I could become something huge.
We could have risen up
into a thing so lovely
we could shroud the sun.

But eventually
like all the other weeds
I was taken out and removed
from her wonderful world of green.

You are waiting for the doctor
you are wondering how your health is
you’re concerned about your leg pains.
You are hoping you’re all right.

And the staff is rushing ’round you
seeking to help other patients.
Line’s not getting any shorter.
No one’s tending to your plight.

You’ve had thoughts about your aging
with your hormones long past raging
you imagine health wars waging.
All the nurses are polite.

Still, you’re no closer to an answer.
Is this a muscle strain or cancer?
Will your daughter see you dance her
after vows on wedding night?

You hope that you’ll survive this
living past this minor crisis.
Treasure future days of true bliss
away from staff all dressed in white

one of whom has called you nearer,
asking questions that make clearer
she suspects what’s wrong. You fear her.
Her reactions give you fright.

She gestures, "Come inside,"
where you swear you won’t reside.
You gulp. You stand. You stride.
You go in, spoiling for fight.

I can do better.
Just give me a chance
one single opportunity
and I can improve my performance
one hundred percent.
One hundred and three!

I get it:
you’re used to more experience,
greater competence
but take it from this cat,
the first cut is the easiest
– well, the sleaziest maybe, but –
look i can do better!

I don’t know what happened
for sure.
I know I froze.
I know I wasn’t up to the task
and my denial of that simple fact
made everything all the worse.
I know I cursed too much,
failed to use a softer touch.
I know it was rough
and I’m ashamed
and embarrassed and
it was a bad job all around, I know it
but I also know
deep down
in an area that I can’t fully explain
that I want to do better.
I can do better.
I will do better.

The question, really,
is whether you’ll let me do better here
or if I’m gonna have to start from scratch
somewhere else.
You’d think you’d want to reap the rewards
after suffering my less-than-stellar efforts until now.
So it’s your choice.
You tell me
if I get the chance
to beat my last score.
I can get an award for Most Improved
(Hell, I better).

So this is Easter
and where have you been
with your Zero World problems
and living in sin?
And this Is Easter
so what have you got?
Bad will for all men
and world peace that’s been shot.

But at least here at Easter
we can still see the moon
before bomb dust has settled
and we’re all dead too soon.

Well, Easter’s upon us (war is coming)
and the strong and the weak (if you want it)
and the poor and the wealthy (If you fight it,)
shall turn no more cheeks (war’s still coming).
So let Easter be merry (War is coming)
for we won’t have too long (if you want it).
Return fire’s coming (If you don’t, then)
and the end of all songs (war’s still coming).

So celebrate Easter
and let’s not place blame
for if Christ could get risen
maybe we’ll do the same.

War is coming,
less you fight it
but if you fight it
a war’s still coming.

War is coming
with three other horsemen
but at least at the end
we’ll all be real thin.

When is The Man ever going to learn
that you simply cannot keep down
the spirit of people?
The people are unstoppable
when the people are united
and the people are united!
We can stand together
against all the evils of the world
like sugared sodas,
modern country
and Latvians
so long as we avoid division in the ranks.

All we need is community
and a shared vision
in which we can safely agree
what must be destroyed
mercilessly and without delay.
If we join together
brothers and sisters
we are mightier than we are apart.

Let us choose
who the enemies will be this week
and then turn the screws
together!

You have nothing, right?
You talk a good game
but it’s become increasingly obvious
with each day on the job
that you don’t have what it takes.
Jesus
how disappointing.

We all had such hopes for you
expectations that you could live up
to what needed to be done.
Do you really think
that farmers in 1492 or whatever
would just lay down on the fields
before they got all the crops in?
It was live or die by your effort, man.
It was kill or be killed.
You don’t have that in you
it’s obvious enough.
You just can’t do this sort of work.

I’m sure
if you look hard enough
you’ll be able to find something
more suitable for you
like beggary or buggary
or something less demanding
that what we do here.
I really thought you were up to this
but it’s obvious
you’re nothing but hot air.
You’re nothing at all.

When you’re older, you’ll remember none of this.
You’ll think back on these years
and struggle to put together a couple of images
of this time
wondering what your life was all about.

You’ll be curious about the fashions
and the religions
and the codes of conduct
separating your present
from this particular past.
When you’re older,
almost all of this will be lost.

It’s not so bad.
Many block out traumas anyhow
and you’ll just naturally have aged out
of the pain you’re feeling now.
You’ll easily outgrow it.
You’ll heal,
practically accidentally.

Still, you will ask sometimes
about the scars
and the aches
and the splash of visuals
flashing across your brain
from month to month.
It won’t be so bad.
It would be worse to remember.

You know, I could be doing
pretty much anything right now.
I could be climbing every mountain,
swimming every sea,
dotting every I
and crossing every T.
I’m an active guy
with active interests
including comic books, music,
and musicals about comic books.
I get around,
is what I’m saying.

But I’m here.
Day after day,
I remain in your periphery,
haunting your locales
stuck in your orbit.
It’s really cramping my style
and, occasionally, my legs.
I could be stretching myself
but instead
I’m beside you.

I sure hope you’re worth it.
Kidding.
I surely pray
that I’m worth you.

I didn’t mind
when alleged civil liberties
were trampled
to stop indoor smoking in New York.
For years
every single club you could find
would be smoke-filled
and soon enough
you were as well.
I never got too upset
being able to breathe indoors.
It seemed a pleasant change
that became a delightful enough norm.

I wasn’t bothered
when the squeegee men began to disappear.
They offered a service
I did not much care for
and felt much better off
with their absence.

When they started cutting out parking in Manhattan,
though,
I realized the danger
of quality of life improvements
in my city.

Anything else done
to make anything better
from now on
has to go through me.

Kat, had you told me
about the troubles
at our start
I don’t know how things would have changed.
But had you spoken truly to me,
I’d like think I’d have been true to you.

We may never know
unless you’ve worked out the kinks
of that time machine.
You… You haven’t, have you?

I hope I would have been more patient
and less judgmental
and much mightier
in my attempts to win you back
that third time.
I hope I wouldn’t have been as snide and bitter.
I hope it would have all worked out better
had you told me up front
about what happened to you.
Really, it couldn’t get much worse.